Depression and suicide

mr dave · 08-23-2010, 02:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mojopinuk

Some peoples attitude towards those with depression is disgusting.

agreed.

i also think the more concerning issue is the belief so many people hold dearly to that the opposite of depression is a feeling of elation. happy is NOT the opposite of sad. not being sad is the opposite of sad.

so many people and so-called professionals seem to be pushing this ideal that we're all supposed to be HAPPY all the time and everyone should be farting sunshine. it's insane. that's not balance. it's forcing one extreme over the other and doesn't actually deal with any legitimate issue.

VEGANGELICA · 08-23-2010, 06:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mr dave

agreed.

i also think the more concerning issue is the belief so many people hold dearly to that the opposite of depression is a feeling of elation. happy is NOT the opposite of sad. not being sad is the opposite of sad.

so many people and so-called professionals seem to be pushing this ideal that we're all supposed to be HAPPY all the time and everyone should be farting sunshine. it's insane. that's not balance. it's forcing one extreme over the other and doesn't actually deal with any legitimate issue.

Once I accepted that quite a bit in life can be frustrating and imperfect, I felt more contentment and appreciation of the "little things," like having food or being able to move. I'd say I often just feel present rather than delighted.

When you expect life to involve a certain degree of discontentment, an occasional sunshine fart is then an added bonus.

Like you, I have seen a lot of press about feeling happy and at peace. For example, consider that best-selling book, "Eat, Pray, Love," by Elizabeth Gilbert, who went on a world trip to find happiness and meaning in life, as if those were something you "find" outside yourself. People sometimes seem a little obsessed with the pursuit of happiness. I don't know how much the expectation to feel happy actually increases the severity of people's depression or the number of people diagnosed as depressed, though I wonder about this.

My guess is that people whose depression is severe (meaning fairly independent of life events) probably would be very content with just feeling present (alive, but feeling neither bad nor good).

~~Sansa Stark~~ · 08-23-2010, 06:37 AM

idk what's wrong with you freaks, I fart rainbows. ****in noobs

That being said, I don't think people are getting there's a difference between being unhappy sometimes and genuine depression. Also, it's not always that easy at all to get medicated for it. Of course people have said they pass out prescriptions like ****ing candy, but often they're the wrong ones. People should be more informed about what's going on in their ****ing heads, and what they put in their bodies. Even if you have access to treatment, it's hard to even push yourself to get it. Who knows what will work? Why bother? With a mental illness, you obviously don't have the mindset to get help for YOURSELF. I know I sure as **** couldn't, I had to be pushed to do it. With so many people claiming to have this or that these days, it's hard to get properly ****ing diagnosed as well.

People with mental illness aren't weak layabouts. They're people who got dealt ****ty brain chemicals. You can't just tell someone who's genuinely going through a depression HAY MAN LIFT SUM WEIGHTS, EAT SUM SPINACH because that's going to do piss all for them.

Seltzer · 08-23-2010, 06:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vanilla

I've been depressed, in some ways it still lingers around me like a smoky haze. It shocked me one night a couple of weeks ago as I got drunk alone so I could sleep and contemplated going to the kitchen, getting a knife and stabbing my stomach with it. When I woke up the next day I realised how ridiculous that idea was, but there is still that chance if I was upset enough, maybe I would have done it drunk.

This is going to sound weird, but I played out the same scenario in my head in the last year and it scared me how much detail I put into it. I started thinking that I'd just grab the biggest knife in the kitchen and plunge it into my chest... then I decided it would be utterly selfish to allow my flatmates to discover what I'd done in that way, not to mention that it would taint the house. So I mused over all the secluded areas where I could do it, places where I wouldn't disturb anyone or be prevented from doing it. Thank god I haven't plummetted to that level since.

The first time I realised I was depressed was about 9 months ago when I got pissed with my flatmates. Normally I'm a pretty happy and jovial drunk but that time, I was just morose and disconnected. Completely flat. So I sat down the end of our hallway for a while with the lights off, and later lay flat on the lawn outside. I know it doesn't help that alcohol is inherently a depressant, but that's not to say it can't reveal truths, feelings and moods that you choose to ignore and even suppress by day.

mr dave · 08-23-2010, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VEGANGELICA

Like you, I have seen a lot of press about feeling happy and at peace. For example, consider that best-selling book, "Eat, Pray, Love," by Elizabeth Gilbert, who went on a world trip to find happiness and meaning in life, as if those were something you "find" outside yourself. People sometimes seem a little obsessed with the pursuit of happiness. I don't know how much the expectation to feel happy actually increases the severity of people's depression or the number of people diagnosed as depressed, though I wonder about this.

My guess is that people whose depression is severe (meaning fairly independent of life events) probably would be very content with just feeling present (alive, but feeling neither bad nor good).

that last bit is totally spot on. i've dealt with depression for longer than most MBers have breathed oxygen. i don't want to be happy all the time, i just want to not be depressed all the time - and it INFURIATES me to no end when someone tells me i'm 'supposed' to be happy when i'm enjoying a flat day (i'd rather be bored than bummed out).

as for Eat, Pray, Love what a crock of self serving garbage. the whole self-discovery angle is a contrived plot to sell a travel book. but it's not like Hollywood would bother pointing that out or filming worthwhile adaptations when they can cash in on common insecurities without presenting any sort of redeeming idea or message.

bannister · 08-23-2010, 06:52 PM

I agree with mojopin. It's ****ing appalling how many people in this thread have written off depressed or suicidal people as nothing more than a nuisance.

I've tried multiple times to intelligently explain how much this pisses me off, but I've just ended up typing a ton of obscenities that won't make it through the filter anyways. >:|

**Scarlett O'Hara** · 08-23-2010, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bannister

I agree with mojopin. It's ****ing appalling how many people in this thread have written off depressed or suicidal people as nothing more than a nuisance.

I've tried multiple times to intelligently explain how much this pisses me off, but I've just ended up typing a ton of obscenities that won't make it through the filter anyways. >:|

Exactly. It's easy to write off depression when you've never been through it yourself. It's not just a matter of being sad, it's being empty, feeling numb, feeling as though you don't know who is in the mirror.

CanwllCorfe · 08-23-2010, 07:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seltzer

Thank god I haven't plummetted to that level since.

Me and you both! I never got to the level either of you have, but then again I don't really know what it is I had.. or still have. I still have issues with anxiety and sometimes I have a couple days where I'll feel like I used to, but it's nowhere near what it used to be. I had issues with being social, issues with energy and sadness and pretty much a complete disregard for hygiene. I remember at one point I had worn the same socks for.. I don't even know how long. A month? Longer, shorter, couldn't tell you. I wore them outside so they were muddy and inundated with all kinds of who knows what. I do remember thinking I walked through water in the kitchen but it turned out to be dog piss. My response was "oh".. but somehow I still didn't change them. It didn't really phase me. I would just pick up clothes off the floor knowing they weren't clean, I wouldn't shower for weeks, and every time I got paid I pretty much just put in the bank and didn't really get anything. I didn't realize how bad it was up until a week or two ago when I saw an old picture of myself and it kind of brought it all back. Those were some ****ty times

EDIT: After doing some reading I found that

Quote:

Some become increasingly neglectful psychologically and physically, even to the point of neglecting basic hygiene

Which is a symptom of the "self deserting avoidant"; a mix of the Depressive and Avoidant personality disorders. So I guess it wasn't just Avoidant then. Well that answers a lot!

Guybrush · 08-24-2010, 02:40 AM

I think it's important that depressed people don't just think "oh alright, I'm sick then". Depression is a natural feeling which all of us are capable of and so only a small portion of the depressed people in the world should actually be sick. If you are depressed and don't know why, I figure you should take a moment and try to figure out if there's anything in your life you think might cause you depression and then try and can change that. If that doesn't work, consider counselling. A trained psychologist can help you figure out underlying problems which may not be appearant and can hook you up with medication if the problem has simply to do with brain chemistry.

If you can do that, it's almost guaranteed to work and it beats killing yourself and hurting everyone who care about you.

I suffered from anxiety myself for a while and the worst period of it was when I kept it a secret. Telling my parents and getting their support and then and seeking counselling were important steps on the road to recovery. It wasn't really as difficult/hard as I feared either.

Spike*Spiegel · 08-24-2010, 10:50 AM

That's called willful ignorance
Edit: in reply to the bottom portion of Paloma's post

View Poll Results: Is suicide cowardly?
Yes	39	20.74%
No	79	42.02%
Sometimes, depends on the circumstances (kids etc.)	70	37.23%
Voters: 188. You may not vote on this poll

08-23-2010, 06:37 AM	#63 (permalink)
~~Sansa Stark~~ Account Disabled Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: The Eyrie, Vale of Arryn, Westeros Posts: 3,234	idk what's wrong with you freaks, I fart rainbows. **in noobs That being said, I don't think people are getting there's a difference between being unhappy sometimes and genuine depression. Also, it's not always that easy at all to get medicated for it. Of course people have said they pass out prescriptions like ing candy, but often they're the wrong ones. People should be more informed about what's going on in their ing heads, and what they put in their bodies. Even if you have access to treatment, it's hard to even push yourself to get it. Who knows what will work? Why bother? With a mental illness, you obviously don't have the mindset to get help for YOURSELF. I know I sure as couldn't, I had to be pushed to do it. With so many people claiming to have this or that these days, it's hard to get properly ing diagnosed as well. People with mental illness aren't weak layabouts. They're people who got dealt *ty brain chemicals. You can't just tell someone who's genuinely going through a depression HAY MAN LIFT SUM WEIGHTS, EAT SUM SPINACH because that's going to do piss all for them. Last edited by Sansa Stark; 08-23-2010 at 06:44 AM.*

08-23-2010, 06:52 PM	#66 (permalink)
bannister Music Addict Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: East Bay, CA Posts: 127	I agree with mojopin. It's ****ing appalling how many people in this thread have written off depressed or suicidal people as nothing more than a nuisance. I've tried multiple times to intelligently explain how much this pisses me off, but I've just ended up typing a ton of obscenities that won't make it through the filter anyways. >:\| __________________ You're not punk, and I'm telling everyone. ____ last.fm ____ "Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. But, set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life." - Terry Pratchett

08-24-2010, 02:40 AM	#69 (permalink)
Guybrush Juicious Maximus III Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Scabb Island Posts: 6,525	I think it's important that depressed people don't just think "oh alright, I'm sick then". Depression is a natural feeling which all of us are capable of and so only a small portion of the depressed people in the world should actually be sick. If you are depressed and don't know why, I figure you should take a moment and try to figure out if there's anything in your life you think might cause you depression and then try and can change that. If that doesn't work, consider counselling. A trained psychologist can help you figure out underlying problems which may not be appearant and can hook you up with medication if the problem has simply to do with brain chemistry. If you can do that, it's almost guaranteed to work and it beats killing yourself and hurting everyone who care about you. I suffered from anxiety myself for a while and the worst period of it was when I kept it a secret. Telling my parents and getting their support and then and seeking counselling were important steps on the road to recovery. It wasn't really as difficult/hard as I feared either. __________________ Something Completely Different

08-24-2010, 10:50 AM	#70 (permalink)
Spike*Spiegel Five Feet of Fury Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: suburbanite Posts: 761	That's called willful ignorance Edit: in reply to the bottom portion of Paloma's post