I don't believe for the same reason you do believe

You don't believe because of a lack of faith? I have faith in the octopus - why isn't that good enough to justify its existence?

My sentiments exactly. If I had the choice of hanging out with a bunch of middle-aged, fat ass American Baptists for the rest of eternity or staying here and rotting in the ****in' ground, I think I'd take the latter.

Hi guys. I wish to promote the monotheist religion of the Holy Sanctuary of Swimming Staplers. HSST. It is known that everyone has undetectable staples within themselves that cause disease. These staples are undetectable by any human or mortal means.

Can I be a deacon in your church?

Sleepyjack and Djchameleon, why do you believe in such random things? Things that are merely constructed by the Holy Stapler to amuse itself.

Yes Janszoon, you may become a Prophet of the Holy Sanctuary.

We serve only in the name of The Almighty and Eternally Holy Stapler.

He Who Governs All is Righteous in his constituents.

The Omniscient Stapler of Holyness has oversight over the proceedings of this thread and this forum.

May we please it's Holy Righteousness.

I am acting merely on the Most Benevolent Proceedings of the Holy Might of the Great Stapler.

The Holy Stapler has forgiven this one trespass upon the 69 Sanctums of Behavior.
May the Great Stapler have mercy on your Staple.

You will have your staple torn asunder and cast into the fiery trash can for this heresy! The avenging angel cometh:

http://store2shop-lb.com/images/stap...ver%5B1%5D.jpg