Physical discipline against children .. okay or not?

**Frownland** · 10-28-2016, 03:03 PM

"Children are the ones who get hit the most but deserve the least."
-Louis CK

Or something.

**Goofle** · 10-30-2016, 04:50 AM

Obviously you shouldn't spank children.

Edit: I previously wrote "be able to" but due to the wide variety of spanking I don't think it's quite right to say that.

Thelonious Monkey · 10-30-2016, 08:22 AM

I was physically abused by my mother, so obviously I don't think hitting children in any way is a good idea.

Ol’ Qwerty Bastard · 10-30-2016, 08:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by _Violet_

I was physically abused by my mother, so obviously I don't think hitting children in any way is a good idea.

Awh

ily buddy

Guybrush · 10-31-2016, 06:18 AM

For those who bother to check out the meta study, it says that even for the usually intended purpose of correcting behaviour, spanking is ineffective. Hence, even if there were no negative consequences from spanking (which there are), there would be better ways to correct behaviour.

Somewhat related to the effectiveness of spanking; when spanking proves ineffective, a normal counter-measure from parents is to try and increase the intensity of the spanking. This obviously leads to more violence (and related consequences), but not necessarily better results (behaviour correction).

The assumption that kids can't be reasoned with seems assumptive and lazy. Is that really true (feel free to link to studies)? And even if it is true, which I'm sceptical about, does it mean you're left with violence as the only option? I think not.

Although Chula formulates this argument in a somewhat different way which is hard to disagree with, the argument that "I was beat and turned out fine" is fallacious. You can't know how you would've turned out if you were subjected to a different upbringing and you may carry scars that you are not aware of.

Chula Vista · 10-31-2016, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tore

You can't know how you would've turned out if you were subjected to a different upbringing and you may carry scars that you are not aware of.

I definitely have scars buried. I've forgiven my mom for the abuse and my dad for the apathy but the memories don't just go away. When I had my nervous breakdown 2 years ago along with having to start new meds I had to see a shrink a few times. In one session it all came out and the shrink was visibly shaken by the things I told her. I was left a quivering mess afterwards.

Aloysius · 10-31-2016, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tore

the argument that "I was beat and turned out fine" is fallacious.

I completely agree. We hear this all the time in other guises - "my grandad smoked 2 packets a day and lived to 100", "I know someone who wasn't vaccinated and they didn't die of a horrific disease" and so on.

I've never hit my kids (admittedly I was never hit and usually people just continue the parenting style of their parents). We still use negative consequences (like time out) on occasions, but causing physical pain just feels like it's crossing a dangerous line.

~~Cuthbert~~ · 10-31-2016, 04:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aloysius

I completely agree. We hear this all the time in other guises - "my grandad smoked 2 packets a day and lived to 100", "I know someone who wasn't vaccinated and they didn't die of a horrific disease" and so on.

+

"I was circumcised and I'm fine."

Ol’ Qwerty Bastard · 10-31-2016, 05:10 PM

I was circumcised and I'm fine.

Guybrush · 10-31-2016, 02:18 PM

Physical punishment wasn't really something my parents did, except one time. One of my earliest memories is of my father giving me a slap on the hand for something. I guess I may have been three or four years old and I can't remember what I'd done, only the punishment. There's very little I can remember from fatherly interaction at that age, so it definitely left an impression.

View Poll Results: Physical punishment aganist children. Acceptable or Unacceptable?
Acceptable	50	56.82%
Unacceptable	38	43.18%
Voters: 88. You may not vote on this poll

10-28-2016, 03:03 PM	#1 (permalink)
Frownland SOPHIE FOREVER Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: East of the Southern North American West Posts: 35,541	"Children are the ones who get hit the most but deserve the least." -Louis CK Or something. __________________ Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth. d e a f b o x

10-31-2016, 06:18 AM	#5 (permalink)
Guybrush Juicious Maximus III Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Scabb Island Posts: 6,525	For those who bother to check out the meta study, it says that even for the usually intended purpose of correcting behaviour, spanking is ineffective. Hence, even if there were no negative consequences from spanking (which there are), there would be better ways to correct behaviour. Somewhat related to the effectiveness of spanking; when spanking proves ineffective, a normal counter-measure from parents is to try and increase the intensity of the spanking. This obviously leads to more violence (and related consequences), but not necessarily better results (behaviour correction). The assumption that kids can't be reasoned with seems assumptive and lazy. Is that really true (feel free to link to studies)? And even if it is true, which I'm sceptical about, does it mean you're left with violence as the only option? I think not. Although Chula formulates this argument in a somewhat different way which is hard to disagree with, the argument that "I was beat and turned out fine" is fallacious. You can't know how you would've turned out if you were subjected to a different upbringing and you may carry scars that you are not aware of. __________________ Something Completely Different

10-31-2016, 02:18 PM	#10 (permalink)
Guybrush Juicious Maximus III Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Scabb Island Posts: 6,525	Physical punishment wasn't really something my parents did, except one time. One of my earliest memories is of my father giving me a slap on the hand for something. I guess I may have been three or four years old and I can't remember what I'd done, only the punishment. There's very little I can remember from fatherly interaction at that age, so it definitely left an impression. __________________ Something Completely Different

10-30-2016, 08:22 AM	#3 (permalink)
Thelonious Monkey Caesar is home. Join Date: Sep 2014 Posts: 876	I was physically abused by my mother, so obviously I don't think hitting children in any way is a good idea.