Sun readers don't realise there are pages after page three... :rolleyes:

^ A genuine LOL at that remark! Very good, Trollheart! :laughing:

Why would anybody read a newspaper that didn't have topless babes?

Who doesn't want breath that smells like rotting buffalo arse? So cool.

People who have just smoked sometimes smell like butter. It's a kind of sweet smell. It's not great but it always reminded me of butter.

Think about this next time you smell someone who just smoked.

I've been holding a cigarette probably four times a day seven days a week now for about in the region of seven years for my sister who can no longer smoke by herself, and all I have ever smelled is dirty nasty smoke getting down my throat and up my nose. I can't believe it's not butter. That's cos it isn't!

Being a non-smoker = ****ing a rotting buffalo arse

If you pick up the habit then A.) it'll stop stinking, and B.) you'll have something to bond over with your sister. And only smoking four cigs a day would be torture.

I'm never going to pick up the habit, it's filthy. But I expect I'll get cancer before her. Oh well, so it goes.

Also, we already bond over so many things, not least the fact that circumstances have decreed we shall spend the rest of our lives together.

So's shitting. Would you give that up?