The Batlord

Batlord for mod cause he needs a job.

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Marie Monday

my local pub is looking for a barman you know

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The Batlord

Will I have to share the booze?

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Frownland

No need. I imagine their Steele Reserve supply is basically untouched.

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Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth.

The Batlord

Wait wait wait. Bars have malt liquor? I always assumed they didn't bother.

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Lisnaholic

Yep, I agree with all the praise for your modding style, Marie. You do a great job of being friendly, and when necessary, putting out any fires with a brief comment, not a lecture.

Happily, MB's more toxic days seem to have passed, but I'd like to return to the topic of passivity that someone mentioned. I feel passivity is more damaging to MB than any lingering toxicity. I'm sure newcomers turn away because they get impatient with the lack of action/response they see. This is most noticeable in the threads dedicated to music; they seem to shrivel and die like unwatered plants in a garden and this happens much more so than in the past. Maybe that's because of reduced membership numbers.

There's one thread that I see as a kind of barometer of MB's health because it operates on a simple principle of short exchanges about music: a rec, a one-line reaction, a rec, a reaction and so on. That's surely the core dynamic of MB, and while the thread ran here for years, it has since flatlined, indicating that the MB patient does indeed have some health issues:-

Mini-Review The Song Above You: https://www.musicbanter.com/general-...e-you-225.html

Lastly, have we done all the metaphors for MB yet? We've had the sinking ship, the clubhouse with just a few old newspapers lying around and now the patient in the ICU, but I bet there are some metaphors we've missed. Any suggestions?

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"Am I enjoying this moment? I know of it and perhaps that is enough." - Sybille Bedford, 1953

Guybrush

Thank you so much, ribbons! You yourself impart a warmth to these forums that I really appreciate forums tend to breed or attract a lot of cynics and true kindness is a rare quality that often seems sadly underappreciated.

About the toxic environment, I know we lost several key members to it some 10ish years ago or so. I myself don't much mind being the target of that sort of attention, but when ****posting starts to derail every attempt at serious discussion, even long-time posters can only take so much.

The environment now is much better than it was, so at least that's a welcome change.

About activity, I'm admittedly a fairly long-winded poster. I can't write posts any time of day which are currently spent preparing meals, playing with the kids, being out in nature, reading at bedtime, etc. It takes me a long time to write a post like this (on my phone), so I typically have to wait until an opportune moment. I can usually squeeze like one or two replies in Writing from the god awful phone.. I'm sure it halves my posting, probably more. I think phone optimization would help some.

Marie Monday deserves all kudos It's interesting to come back and see a completely new name in blue. I'm happy you've made a home here, Marie.

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Something Completely Different

Guybrush

By the way, if you want a quick look at some of the stuff that went on here about 10 years back, the first pages of this old thread makes for some interesting reading

https://www.musicbanter.com/announce...subscribe.html

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Something Completely Different

Trollheart

I remember at one point a few years ago I had decided I had had it. Too much toxicity and much of it directed at me. Someone, who shall remain nameless but might think they can fly with magic, issued the worst insult you can to me (well, almost the worst) and called me a terrible writer. Now I'm many things, and I try not to be arrogant, always laughing at myself (no seriously: every morning I look in the mirror and go "look at that idiot!") but this hurt. One thing I do know is I'm a decent writer. I may not be a great one, but I'm not a bad one and I'm definitely not a terrible one.

Anyway, packed my bags and left quietly. As if! Being me, I had to go on a long diatribe, vilifying those who had insulted me and rambling on about how nasty the place had got. Well, upshot was a lot of people said they'd miss me, which was nice, but even better was that the two main culprits pulled in their horns and came as close as you would ever expect of them to an apology. I won't lie: I was touched and impressed. It's a fat man who admits his - sorry, a big man who admits his mistakes. So I stayed.

Boo, I hear you say. Well tough. I'm not going nowhere now, at least not till someone learns me English proper.

The point is, talking about it (okay, okay, ranting about it) actually made a difference, and I'd like to think that perhaps a turning point was reached, and certain people realised they had to be a bit more understanding of the feelings of others. Was this Ground Zero or Day One for a new Music Banter? Don't know, but since then the place has been a lot easier to visit and it's more fun playing in the sandbox when the bullies aren't kicking sand in your face and robbing your toys.

Nevertheless, I too would be of the opinion and view that a place where everyone has to be nice to everyone all the time, and is afraid to say the wrong thing, would not be somewhere I would want to be. At this point I think we have the balance just right.

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018