Originally Posted by rubber soul (Post 2210985)

Exactly. I actually left here twice because of the toxic atmosphere, the second time being especially so bad that I even started a goodbye thread to make my point. Anyway, I also think Marie is the big difference. She'll give you some leeway, especially in the political arena, but she doesn't mess with personal attacks like they would have here before her.

So, never leave us, Marie. We really need you :)

Originally Posted by SGR (Post 2210984)

You're too nice! You've got nothing to apologize for. Your point is a valid one. Toxicity and spitefulness will drive some new (and old) members away, to some degree. In the early days of the internet (think late '90s), people would communicate crassly and often times vulgarly. There were much fewer rules than there are now. To that extent, we carry on the tradition in some ways here. Other parts of the internet are more strict in their moderation approach, some subreddits even having rules about not being mean to people.

If every member on here was as nice as you, we'd certainly be a more welcoming place, no question about it. But on the other hand, a little antagonism now and then livens this place up and even if emotions get involved, it sometimes results in a more productive or interesting discussion. I guess there's a balance and a trade-off with it, ya know? I guess what I'm saying is that I wouldn't want our moderators to crack down on members being mean to each other - at least not with passing snide remarks you know? If it got to the point where it was sustained and continuous targeting of a member, that would be another story. I think I'm rambling a bit now, so I'll just leave it there.

EDIT: As others have noted, Marie interjecting in threads that are getting heated/personal with "Don't be a dick" and not outright threatening to ban people is probably a good balance, and that's we seem to be at now.

Originally Posted by ribbons (Post 2210989)

Thank you so much, SGR! You make a lot of sense as usual - it's all about the balance between the spice and the sugar here :laughing: and your contributions are one of the best examples of that balance. You are very level-headed and witty and kind, plus a very good writer - I've often noticed that! Glad to have this opportunity to tell you so. Thanks again! :beer:

And just for the record, I hate posting on my phone too, and do that very rarely.

Originally Posted by SGR (Post 2210984)

You're too nice! You've got nothing to apologize for. Your point is a valid one. Toxicity and spitefulness will drive some new (and old) members away, to some degree. In the early days of the internet (think late '90s), people would communicate crassly and often times vulgarly. There were much fewer rules than there are now. To that extent, we carry on the tradition in some ways here. Other parts of the internet are more strict in their moderation approach, some subreddits even having rules about not being mean to people.

If every member on here was as nice as you, we'd certainly be a more welcoming place, no question about it. But on the other hand, a little antagonism now and then livens this place up and even if emotions get involved, it sometimes results in a more productive or interesting discussion. I guess there's a balance and a trade-off with it, ya know? I guess what I'm saying is that I wouldn't want our moderators to crack down on members being mean to each other - at least not with passing snide remarks you know? If it got to the point where it was sustained and continuous targeting of a member, that would be another story. I think I'm rambling a bit now, so I'll just leave it there.

EDIT: As others have noted, Marie interjecting in threads that are getting heated/personal with "Don't be a dick" and not outright threatening to ban people is probably a good balance, and that's we seem to be at now.

Originally Posted by ribbons (Post 2210982)

No he doesn't. I also noticed a positive turn when you became a Mod, Marie. You keep things in line without being a spoilsport, as TH said. And you are honest and fair and an extremely decent person (which I've been the lucky beneficiary of more than a few times in the past).