Chula Vista

Where is that Dafoe picture from?

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“The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well,
on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away
and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.”

Frownland

It's the opening scene of his sex tape.

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Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth.

Key

And thus, everything was ok. Gotta say, still lovin this MB. Everyone's super cool again.

grindy

Exo taught me how to butt plug.

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A smell of petroleum prevails throughout.

rubber soul

Yep, a discussion about guns will do that. Glad everyone worked things out though

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Trollheart

Yeah, everyone tends to shoot their mouth off, and there's more than enough ammunition for personal insults. Still, if you're triggered by such things maybe you should just take stock and not be so butthurt. Discussions like this aren't usually a barrel of laughs, but there's no need to hammer the point home. Tends to make a lot of people recoil, best to go for safety first so you don't have to slug it out.

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Frownland

That was really half assed but at least you gave it a shot.

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Studies show that when a given norm is changed in the face of the unchanging, the remaining contradictions will parallel the truth.

Trollheart

Would have been better had you said I went off half-cocked...

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018

Neapolitan

You're a real pistol.

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Trollheart

Note: please don't tl;dr this post. It's too important.

I'm posting this here because
a) it's the correct place to discuss such things
b) I don't want the World Cup thread derailed any more than it has been already and
c) a lot of you don't go into that thread and so won't know what happened
d) I'm still really angry about it and am not satisfied with the "resolution".

But I think this is generally being seen as something to be quietly swept under the carpet and forgotten about, and I honestly believe a dialogue is needed, in the light of the so-called new rules.

So, for those who don't know: in the World Cup thread there was a post of Batty's which I made an unfunny reply to, but it wasn't offensive that I could see. In response I got this:

After asking why, seeing as how this came, to me, out of nowhere, I then got this:

My response after that was this:

Now, whether you think that was an OTT response, as both Frownland and Batty have intimated/said, or not, the implication in this post is clear: you've gone too far. Cut it out.

Batty's further responses (which I won't bother quoting as there was a lot of back-and-forth, me getting angrier all the time) was basically to say "**** you dude: you said I could slag your sister". Sadly, and while I have to admit he kind of did his job as mod by telling Batty to cool it - which he really did not - Frownland basically supported this position, telling me in as many words, you asked for it dude.

The point I want to make here is that no matter what "permission" you may have been given (and I never really did: I just accepted Batty's comments previously because I thought he knew where the line was and wouldn't cross it) everyone should have the right to say, too far dude. Not cool. As I did. And then the joke, such as it is, should be over.

But far from doing this, Batty continued to whine and bitch that it was my fault, even going so far as to demand an apology from ME!

The comment was horrible, but even at that, I'm not so angry at that as I am at the fact that when I said stop, that's too far, very clearly and loudly, Batty did not. He kept pushing it and unfortunately for me, the only mod in the thread was Frownland. His friendship/alliance with Batty meant that, while he again sort of did his job, it was with a kind of "well, you know, didn't you say ..." kind of attitude. Had anyone else been in there - grindy, Exo, Plankton - I feel that Batty would have been warned, and if he kept on at me maybe he might have got a day ban or something. But nothing happened because these two are tight. Which makes me feel like basically there was no mod there really.

I've also noticed Batty's comments towards me becoming increasingly nasty, for whatever reason. Just recently he said "get cancer", again to some small joke I made. He did PM me about another incident, which I didn't actually think was anything as serious as this, to apologise, which is why his comments yesterday both amazed and angered me. If he could apologise for a stupid thing that I kind of really didn't take offence at, why not for something that was much more serious and deep, and that I clearly was offended by?

So the question is: regardless of what so-called permission has been given, is there not a point where you can say, you've gone too far, and if so, should the person making the comments not then stop immediately?

After all, if you loan your car to someone and they crash it, is it okay for them to say "well dude you said I could drive it!"? Does that make sense?

Even leaving my specific situation aside, don't there need to be clear guidelines set down - and adhered to - for when someone crosses the line and is told unequivocally that they have?

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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018