Quote:
Originally Posted by Urban Hatemonger
I would say neither.
Personally I think physical discipline should only be used as a last resort when the child is putting themselves in danger and have been asked several times to stop, like messing around on a busy road or playing with something dangerous.
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The reason I ask is because I assume that most people who are pro-smacking got smacked when they were kids and I believe it teaches kids that it's okay for their parents to smack them. I expect an answer could be that it's not okay for a parent to smack today because the person asked is an adult now, but that it would be okay if they were kids. But then I wonder, at what point in time or at what age does it become immoral to slap someone? When should you, as a parent, treat your kid with the kind of general respect you have for adults?
I would answer that question saying that it's never, at no point in time, okay for my father to slap me. When I have kids, I want to teach them that in our family, we don't slap or otherwise physically punish. I don't want that kind of behaviour to be a tool in our communicative toolbox. I hope that I will be able to instill in my kids a certainty, pride and self-assurance that tells them that if ever another grown-up lay hands on them, they will know that this adult is doing something which is not okay. And eventually as they grow up, I hope they would see in retrospect that I as a father treated them with love as well as the respect that I treat other adults with, even though they were kids.
I remember when I was a kid, we were visited by another family who were friends of my parents. I remember their boy did something which the parents didn't approve of. It was relatively trivial, but he got slapped for it and started crying. This happened at the dinner table and even though I was a kid, I remember I was shocked and horrified. It's never been okay with me and then as well as today, I'm thankful for my parents that they never did that to me.