Cunning,
At first I thought the song was going to be funny, because "tails" should be "tales." I kept expecting the song to be about the tails of dogs from a broken dog house!
Then I realized the song was about a child dealing with the emotional wreckage of parents splitting up.
Is the "blueness" of the fire representing that the fire has gotten very hot? I thought I remembered that fires are hottest when they are blue...or is that coldest? Now I can't remember.
I feel that in this song the rhyming sometimes becomes more important than the meaning, so the rhyming becomes somewhat obtrusive to me. This is especially true for me on the lines, "He has a slight clue" and "They thought talking about others made a whole lot of sense." I think the lines about how the neighbors feel talking about others make a lot of sense seems peripheral to the storyline and could be altered without hurting the rest of the song. It sounds to me a little like it was put in as an afterthought to complete the rhyming pattern. Also, I feel the extensive rhyming gives the song a sort of humorous feeling to me, which I don't know if you want.
"Stable by glue" reminds me of the song "Steady as She Goes." In your song, is the glue not supposed to be very stabilizing? Your song seems to imply it wasn't very strong. Your song could actually be quite a good follow up to "Steady as She Goes" (a song a like loads)...showing what happens after a couple supposedly becomes stabilized by relationship goo/glue:
Raconteurs - Steady as She Goes
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neapolitan:
If a chicken was smart enough to be able to speak English and run in a geometric pattern, then I think it should be smart enough to dial 911 (999) before getting the axe, and scream to the operator, "Something must be done! Something must be done!"
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Last edited by VEGANGELICA; 06-22-2010 at 03:00 AM.
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