aveneficus

You are but a distant memory to me now,
A ghost of the ghost I've left to rest.
I can hardly recall the moonlight reflections
From green eyes and an off-white smile.

And I can still faintly hear you cursing my name,
I cannot remember what I'd done wrong -
No, not this time.

Fabrications and mistakes -
Easily remedied, but never repaired.
Anger, ire and destructive desires came easier to you.

And sweet talk always came easily to me,
With only a few twists of my tongue -
A beautiful girl becomes a goddess,
A lowly tramp - a noble king's daughter.

But you've said it many times yourself
And now I could not agree more:
What's left? Underneath a gleaming exterior?

I learned to love from you.
From the hate you bred in me.

I remember thirty minute drives
And watching paychecks evaporate in my gas tank,
Singing songs that I made you sing too.

Sometimes screaming to myself "why bother?"
Then thinking. . . "am i crazy too?"

You never knew how many times I lost myself.
I should have told you.
I should have pulled over to breathe,

But instead I pressed the pedal harder.
And I would get there faster,
Not wanting to get there at all.

But I'm glad that I did.
If not for your embrace,
To learn. I had so much to learn.

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