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Old 02-05-2009, 12:16 AM   #7 (permalink)
Ace
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Join Date: Jul 2006
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Somehow, I don't think this song is complete without adding the line "taste the rainbow".

I rather liked the middle, but I think the very start needs to be redone.
Using the word colors twice, doesn't go well for me. I try to never use the same words twice in succession, unless it's almost impossible not to.

Branching off from the "swimmer" line into "waist deep", was good. I like lyrics that are formed around general topics and tell stories.
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