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Ayn Marx · 06-23-2022, 02:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Guybrush

I don't think it's that much of a mystery. We're social mammals and there's nothing in our biology that says males shouldn't have sex with other males, like homosexuality in so many other social mammals (like the famous giraffes where most of a male's sexual encounters are homosexual in nature). From a biology point of view, it seems reasonable to think that sexual relations between men would be promoted in many situations because it could strengthen bonds, promote cooperation (our specialty) and generally help satisfy various needs. I actually get the impression that males are more likely to be sexually compatible with other males (in terms of wants/desires, etc) than with women. As you point out, there's even a prostate gland that enjoys attention.

Heterosexuality is just a human concept. It's not written in our DNA. When fantasy meets reality, parts of fantasy can melt away. Our sexuality, if you look at it under intense scrutiny, doesn't actually fit into these neat categories. Generally speaking for heterosexuals, there are potential situations where they'd enjoy homosexual activities or possibly even romantic relationships with other same-sex individuals. Maybe, if society was different, they would.

If I'm to use society's general descriptors for myself, then I am a heterosexual man. I've never been in love with other men and 99% of my fantasies are about women. However, there are a very few men I've found attractive and I assume part of those 99% can be explained by society's conditioning. I have actually had a couple of homosexual encounters that were enjoyable for me. If I was free to do so, I wouldn't mind exploring that more with the right partner.

I don't think that's the norm, so what might set me apart from perhaps most other heterosexual guys is I think of sexuality as very rough descriptors and don't internalize it into my own identity. I am not homophobic, am fairly liberal and want to have enjoyable experiences. So I don't think I'm different in a fundamental way from most heterosexual guys, I just have a different way of thinking about it.

What I think is most mysterious or interesting is why we create memes (as in moral codes, religious commands, beliefs) that control various aspects of our lives in a seemingly detrimental way, especially when it comes to sexuality. I have an inkling - things that control our most basic urges seem powerful and feel important to us, like celibacy or perhaps fasting. These memes compete against other memes (gay is wrong / gay is okay are competing ideas), but for some reason the bad ones sometimes get ahead in competition with other more tolerant ideas. I find that to be a very fascinating topic in general.

Well put but the question remains why so many males are not only homophobic but actually terrified by the mere idea. I have one theory and it’s a wild jump. Men I’ve known more often than not regard the female of our species as inferior. Therefore to even contemplate something like taking the so called passive role in male/male sex is to ‘lower’ yourself to the level of a chic/sheila/bird/. I’m only guessing here.
Not that I’ve found it a problem over the decades having found more than enough males willing to dance the bedroom tango.
I even had a relationship for two years with another man and two women. Hard to explain other than suggesting our bedroom tango was an ‘eight way’. Think about it.