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ArmyofMe · 04-23-2006, 02:20 PM

^just trying to give you some of that criticism

You used "I" too many times, try to give it a feel that you aren't the only person in the song, maybe use some of the beat to describe the one you are drawn towards.

04-23-2006, 02:20 PM	#4 (permalink)
ArmyofMe mhmm Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: ummm... Posts: 69	^just trying to give you some of that criticism You used "I" too many times, try to give it a feel that you aren't the only person in the song, maybe use some of the beat to describe the one you are drawn towards. __________________ bah..