I really hope it doesn't come to that, Lucem. You are cool (and pretty smart) and I really hope that at some point your life stabilizes a bit, which would hopefully make it easier to deal with the horrible **** that is haunting you and possibly even find a bit of happiness in life.
It would be sad to see you robbed of that opportunity, even if it might seem far-fetched to you at the moment.
I've been obsessing about suicide at a few points in my life, although I had a far better hand dealt to me than you. I never really tried anything and it was more of an OCD persistent thought thing anyway, but I'm so happy I didn't act on it. Life is so damn good nowadays.
__________________
A smell of petroleum prevails throughout.
|