Quote:
Originally Posted by elphenor
I find the thing I dread most is being home for the night after work
there sneaks in a hopeless claustrophobia where my mania comes to rest...I begin to feel a sickness wash over me and a sense of dread as if a fly in a spiderweb
when Im outside at night though there is the feeling that I could go anywhere...be anyone
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tttt sometimes when I’m giving you **** for drugs and drinking and driving and unsafe sex a part of me is thinking yeah but that’s what he’s supposed to be doing when he’s young living ****ing life with fire and intensity
you’ll have time to dry out and mope around when you’re old... or you’ll die
I drove drunk and drugged up all the ****ing time in my teens and early twenties drunk one night stands no condom all that **** and I can’t even count or remember how many times I’ve been drugged and ****ed up on booze right to the cusp of death **** that was my favorite state of mind in that ****ed up to complete absurdity point