Hear ye! Hear ye! Gather round as your illustrious OP plunges yet again into the grim, frostbitten forests of Skyrim, land of Nords and possibly even a dragon or two! And never was there a host more worthy to bring our tale to life than Dikheth J'urkfaze, dark elf conjurer of extraordinary adequacy and thief of everything not charmed to the floor. See him brave the depths of Dwemer ruins in search of fabulous treasure, marvel as he toboggans down troll-infested mountains on the backs of his lifeless comrades, cheer to his cries of desperate triumph while desperately dog paddling from a school of ravenous slaughterfish. Also something about a human war he cares not a wit for but I'm sure it won't matter.
Yes, dear reader, all this and more coming to a thread near you. Namely this one.