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Old 10-14-2017, 05:18 AM   #523 (permalink)
Trollheart
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Join Date: Oct 2008
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Album title: Songs of Cinema
Artist: Michael Bolton
Genre: Pop/Showtunescore
Nationality: American
Release date: February 10
Position in Discography: Twenty-third
Fear Factor: Low
Familiar with this artist? Yes
Familiar with the genre or subgenre? Kind of
Average RYM Score: 2.56
Well, this is an album I could review and rate without even listening to it, but that's not the Trollheart way, so let's press play. Damn! Bolton really likes to wring the last drop out of every song doesn't he? The male Mariah Carey? A white man who thinks he's a black blues singer? Call him what you will, his voice is certainly distinctive. This collection could of course be sung by anyone and I'd feel much the same about it: basically, who the hell gives one solitary **** about these songs? But there you go: someone obviously does, or do they? This album barely dented either the British top 40 or the Billboard chart. Quite right too. I mean, who hasn't heard “When a Man Loves a Woman”, “Stand by Me” or “I Heard it Through the Grapevine”? And all of the originals are far superior to what Bolton does with them here. Ah well. I guess his swimming pool wasn't quite big enough, or he needed a house exclusively for use only on Thursdays. Can't blame him I suppose. **** yes I can! I think Bolton has made it his mission to be the most annoying, pervasive and pointless artist in creation, constantly bombarding us with albums we neither want nor need. I mean: Ain't No Mountain High Enough: A Tribute to Hitsville USA? Bolton Swings Sinatra? **** the hell off you ****. The only good thing on this comes when Dolly shows him how to sing “I Will Always Love You”. For Bolton, replace love with hate and you have my feelings. Or maybe just ignore. Time to bail the **** out of this self-congratulatory ****fest. And stay the **** away from Seger you turd.


Check out more from this artist? I liked his early stuff, but now? About as much chance as the chances that his next album won't also be a completely pointless tribute to something nobody cares about.
Check out more from this genre or subgenre? Yes

Expectation Index: 9
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