Album title: Theater of Dimensions
Artist: Xandria
Genre: Symphonic Metal/Power Metal/Prog Metal
Nationality: German
Release date: January 27
Position in Discography: Seventh
Fear Factor: Very Low
Familiar with this artist? I've heard one album
Familiar with the genre or subgenre? Very
Average RYM Score: 3.24
The last time I welcomed the arrival of a heavy metal album it bored the hell out of me, so I'm not jumping up and down just yet. Plus, I remember listening to one album by these guys and not being exactly impressed. But at least it's better than sugary-sweet country pop, so we'll give it a chance. But I have to say, I'm getting tired of these female operatic singers. I mean, it's a cliche now and quite annoying. Meh, it's very generic too. Kind of like listening to Nightwish without the ... well ... kind of like listening to Nightwish really. Celtic air to “Forsaken Love”: nobody's ever done that before!
Oh no! Now they've decided to have some “unclean vocals” on one of the tracks, and it's still as boring as ****! Let me predict: one, maybe two ballads, one possibly on piano or acoustic guitar (or both), another instrumental and I can already see a fifteen-minute epic to close. It's gonna be a tough ride.
Oh, here's the first of the ballads. And yes, it's piano-driven. It's like someone is building a symphonic metal album from a pre-programmed pattern. Lord this is boring. Oh my god! The “rhyme” in “Ship of Doom” is embarrassing ---
“One, two, three, four, listen to the cannon's roar” ... you get the idea. And here comes the other instrumental. Oh, I know: let's make it Celtic sounding: that's a new idea! Well, not really Celtic, but sure, if we call it “Ceili” and throw our idea of an Irish reel on it, who will know the difference? Okay, now for some odd reason they think they're Slayer, though they're not even Flesh Wounder. Oh god make it stop! You know, I think I will. **** this. I've done my best to last this out, but this is as far as I go. **** Xandria. I knew I shouldn't have given them another chance.
Check out more from this artist? No way
Check out more from this genre or subgenre? Yes
Expectation Index: 10