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Old 11-20-2014, 06:54 PM   #2232 (permalink)
ladyislingering
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Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Seattle
Posts: 695
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Lately I've been having a lot of pain in my legs (I do walk a lot at work but I'm absolutely accustomed to it), some muscle weakness/stiffness and it scares the hell out of me.

Spoiler for sad stuff, please don't read if you're grieving for any reason:
That's how it started with my mom, when she was around my age. By the time she was 35, she was completely unable to walk on her own. At age 51, she's already had 3 mild strokes, often slurs her words, and lesions have been discovered on her brain. She refuses to use a wheelchair - she uses a rollater (a rolling walker, used for both walking and sitting).

She's taken countless falls over the years, many times in public, leading to serious injuries (one time she pierced her eye because the nosepiece of her glasses cut her on impact). She completely loses control of her balance and body several times a day.

Growing up watching her become sicker and sicker was mortifying. I haven't seen her in 3 years - I couldn't bear the thought of being her caretaker and there will (probably soon) come a day when she can't be left by herself. I worry every day that what happened to her will happen to me. I worry myself sick. Whenever it hurts to stand up for no reason at all, whenever I get a sharp pain in my back or a sudden onset migraine. Whenever I'm limping and don't even realize it. I worry so much.
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