When I started this special section I made mention of one King Diamond, and you probably all thought I was just talking through my ahhhsss ... it happens, I was serious.
No presents for Christmas --- King Diamond --- originally a standalone single, 1985 but rereleased on “Fatal portrait” 1986
Released, as I say above, as the first single from The King since Mercyful Fate broke up, this also found its way onto his debut album, hence the two release years above. samtsirhC ot allinaV It starts off, lulling the unsuspecting listener into a false sense of security if they don’t know what to expect, with a tinny keyboard rendition of “Jingle bells” segueing into “I saw mommy kissing Satan, sorry Santa Claus” before it bursts into a high-powered metal rocket ride, with the King singing at the top of his range.
Pretty good really, considering I wouldn’t listen to a Mercyful Fate album in a fit --- no, not even for Metal Month! --- and it even ends in a keyboard instrumental of “Rudolph the red nosed reindeer”, with a short vocal of “White Christmas” before King D kicks his way out the door with a maniacal laugh. Good fun really, but poor old Noddy Holder must be turning in his grave.
What? He’s not dead? You
sure? Ah. I see. Excuse me just one moment, I have to make an urgent telephone call.
Hello? Taxi, yes, and hurry. Liverpool Cemetery. Quick as you can mate: it’s an emergency…