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Originally Posted by Sansa Stark
It gets tougher and tougher especially when feelings just hit you out of nowhere, I usually have something that triggers them and then I'm like ****, I give up
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I feel completely outside of myself, completely outside of humanity (almost as if I'm just watching everything happen instead of actually interacting, making things happen, etc.) so all of my connections with other people (save for Ki) are superficial, sometimes I can't tell if I'm talking or just imagining things.
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Originally Posted by Rezdaddy Longlegs
I dont mean any offense by this, only to help...but that is a cowardly way to live life. That being said I often find myself doing the same thing and have to remind myself the only reason we are here is to connect with other people, if we do not do that whats the point.
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People have screwed me up and over more often than they've ever fulfilled me to any extent so I'd rather just have a few people close to me, and everyone else can just exist in my blind panorama for all I care...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sansa Stark
Not necessarily. A lot of the times I have to package up my feelings because they come at really inappropriate times (such as in the middle of a manic/mixed episode) and I save them for when I'm more equipped to deal with them in a rational manner instead of compulsively striking out/dealing with them in a destructive way
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I know how that feels, I always reach for the drugs/liquor when I can't deal with my feelings (usually brought on by reminders of past trauma). The weird thing is that I have an absolutely ideal life, but my brain is just not letting me enjoy any of it, ever.