No sorry 216, but when you make a stupid comment like "If I was a rape victim I wouldn't be offended" you are, mate, talking out of your hole. We as men know nothing about rape and how it affects women. DJ, yes I know men CAN be raped, but whether it just doesn't happen as much or the stigma is different so it doesn't get reported as much I don't know, but nine out of ten times when you hear about a rape it's a woman it's happening to, and when we think of rape this is the picture we get.
Which is the more offensive joke (I use the word loosely)? : Woman being raped --- "Rape! She cried hopefully"
or Man being raped
"He should be so lucky!"
Answer: neither. But the idea of men being raped is still looked at --- wrongly of course --- as the man being somehow "lucky" that a woman is having sex with him, albeit without his consent. Stupid and totally wrong, but indicative of the role women play in society and the macho image men are supposed to project. If a woman is raped, the initial reaction from others is shock and sympathy. If a man, then it's disbelief and some sort of schoolboy humour, grinning and saying "Yeah? Really? Are you SURE you were raped?" (Nudge, nudge, wink wink)
Neither reaction make the act less reprehensible: nothing could. But society as a whole still sees men as the aggressors and women as the victims, especially in rape, and by and large (I dont know the figures, maybe you do) the higher percentage of rapes would I think be women as the victims.
Ki, to say "if I were a rape victim" and compare it to "if I were a blind man" is no comparison at all. You can find out what a being blind is like by closing your eyes and walking on the street. Okay, only temporarily, and it doesn't give you the first idea of what the life of a blind person is like at all, but to compare it to rape? How do you find out what it's like to be raped? You can't --- unless you ask someone to rape you --- and these sort of comments from 216 and to some extent CB are ill-founded, mean and trying to trivialise the serious subject of rape. Given that they're talking to a rape victim in JD I think your insensitivity guys has reached new lows. You can't say you didn't know because she told you. And you still think she's overreacting?
This kind of has nothing to do with humour, and it's going OT a little, but the comment that guy made to her is not acceptable, in my view, at any time, and certainly not from a stranger. Whether he's talking to someone who's experienced the ordeal of rape or not is somewhat beside the point. The fact is that EVERY woman --- yes, DJ, and man, but men generally can fight back and it's not I think that common --- fears being attacked, so you can't really say oh he didn't know she was a rape victim. It's not a case of her being or not being one: he should not say it to a woman, who is gender-disposed to worry about such a thing, whether she believes it will happen or not. And why then shoudl she not fear for her safety? Who knows if the guy is going to follow her and make good on his "threat"?
216, you're like a baby screaming that people shouldn't be telling you what you can and can't say, when you've trodden on very thin and sensitive ice here. You've been told it and yet you're still whining about your "rights". Why don't you just admit you made a gross faux pas and leave it at that, instead of insisting you're right to claim knowledge of rape? I'm losing so much respect for you in this thread, I really am. I know: that makes you sit in a corner and cry, doesn't it?
But come on guys: is there no room for pure human compassion here? At all?
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Trollheart: Signature-free since April 2018
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