Quote:
Originally Posted by FETCHER.
Has anyone here's parents divorced?
My mum and dad are threatening divorce n it has come up a few times recently, I don't know if they're just saying this or if it'll actually happen. I can't take the stress of constantly crying over them if they're going to stay together. It devastates me each time it comes up and I wish they would just make their mind up.
What was it like for you  ? |
Quote:
Originally Posted by FRED HALE SR.
My parents divorced when I was 3 years old. I think as an adult it would be much harder to deal with. There certainly were positives that came from it. My parents used to fight alot also. It might hurt but its usually for the best if you can't remain civil any longer. And you would celebrate two christmases and birthdays what could be cooler then that.
|
We've lived similar lives Fred.
One of the drawbacks of parents divorcing when you're younger is that the divorcing parents will usually use the children as pawns in the court precedings, as well as in the emotional tug of war. Although it may happen if the divorce happens when the children are adults as well, it's not as psychologically damaging since an adult child will have the mental maturity to grasp the complicated concepts of it all. Of course it's going to be painful, change always is, but having the cognitive skills to maintain a level attitude would certainly be beneficial. I never had that choice, and it took alot of soul searching, meditation, and counseling with friends to really let go of all that baggage. My brother chose sides, and in doing so created a mental wall that when viewed from my perspective, is very sad. A child NEEDS both parents, wether they're together or not. My daughters mother did terrible terrible things to Hanna and Me, but I've always told Hanna that no matter what she does to us, she loves her even though it may not seem like it.
At any rate Fetch, keep strong for both sides, and if you can help it do not choose. It may not seem like the right thing now, but when the dust blows over, you'll be a better person for it.