If you had to participate in a gladatioral fight to the death

against any famous musician (currently alive) who would it be, why and what would be your tactics for victory?
Personally, I'd choose Thom Yorke from Radiohead. He's got a small reach and puny arms, plus I could pluck out his good eye (Kill Bill II style) leaving him with only the gammy eye to see me with. Hopefully the emperor would let him live though, so that he could write a song about how depressing losing a fight and an eye is.