Quote:
Originally Posted by Freebase Dali
Let's see...
Jesus: Can multiply groceries like 10-fold.
Superman: Can't multiply groceries, any fold.
Jesus: Can turn water into wine.
Superman: Can't even turn piss into Coors Light. (He wouldn't even have to try very hard)
Jesus: Can walk on water
Superman: I haven't seen any evidence to suggest that he can walk on water, although he could probably fly over it, vertically, but that's totally not the same.
Jesus: Is more famous than Superman.
Superman: Is not as famous as Jesus.
(Ok... that last part might be debatable.)
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Superman : Has telescopic vision
Jesus : Is probably near-sighted
Superman : Can lift objects 1,000,000 times his weight
Jesus : Has to rely on his Father to remove the stone from his tomb
Superman : Runs about 1,000 times faster than a normal man
Jesus : Same speed as you and me
Superman : Has died and returned and is still here
Jesus : Has died and returned and left
Superman : Had legitimately married parents (but rites on an alien planet)
Jesus : Bastard son of God