No funny stories I can think of. Like many others I have used socks, magazines, the cardboard from the toilet paper roll, leaves, etc. My old room mate was a big fat crazy motherfucker who tormented the hell out of our other room mate who we didn't like. And it wasn't directly after a dump, but on multiple occasions I heard him exclaim "I DO NOT have the cleanest butthole right now." or another common phrase of his "I have the worlds most sweatiest, swampiest ass right now." Then he would wipe it with our other room mates face towel in his bathroom. I also saw him wipe his ass all over his door handle and his toothbrush (and his visiting girlfriends). It was hilarious at the time. I was also always really, really stoned.
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