Quote:
Originally Posted by Sljslj
EIGHT-THOUSAND HOURS SLEEP… A BLISSFUL COMA
The conscious world is so damn fake
So why do I stay awake?
Surely it’s not for my own sake
‘Cause I stopped caring about me a long time ago
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This sounds like depression, SljSlj!
I think you could write, "Surely not for my own sake" and, "Stopped caring about myself long ago" to get rid of extra words, if you want to.
Quote:
There’s nothing I want more than sleep
‘Cause my true home is a dream
Eight thousand hours of deep sleep
Nothing outside of that appeals to me anymore
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Definitely depression!
What is the significance of eight thousand hours? That's around 333 days, right? So...why?
Quote:
Why must life be spent with open eyes?
Why can’t I just exist inside?
And live where I am most at peace
Eight thousand hours sleep, at least
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You *could* just stay awake but close your eyes!
Try this while walking under a train overpass as the train is going by. Quite a rush.
Back to your lyrics: I feel that when you ask "why" so often, it makes the song tip toward melodrama. When you ask so many rhetorical questions the song sounds to me more like an official speech or, conversely, like a diary.
Quote:
I hate more and more things every day
I just want it to go the **** away
Everything but that dark light, just go away
All I want and need is to just go and stay
Why must life be spent with open eyes?
Why can’t I just exist inside?
And live where I am most at peace
Eight thousand hours sleep, at least
Life is so dead
Just need some rest
**** all the rest
Awake in sleep
A blissful coma
Is all I need
Just go away
Just go and stay
Consciousness is more than bleak
I hate this awakening streak
I just want to sleep forever
I just want to sleep forever
Why must life be spent with open eyes?
Why can’t I just exist inside?
And live where I am most at peace
Eight thousand hours sleep, at least
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The lyrics are consistent in expressing the "go away; life sucks" idea. Without any hints about *why* this person's life is so bad, the lyrics sound to me as if perhaps the person's reaction is overblown compared to the trauma experienced.
Or is the song intended to describe depression, in which the feeling of life's hideousness and superficiality becomes overwhelming and the person wants to withdraw completely into himself?
I like:
"Just need some rest
**** all the rest"
because you use two meanings of "rest."
"Just go away
Just go and stay"
sounds petulant. The lines make the lyrics sound a little humorous to me. I am reminded of one of my favorite poems, from an odd little book I read as a child:
"Touch me not. Touch me not.
Kiss me, I'll cry.
There's nothing the matter
but a tear in my eye.
I'll stand in the corner.
I'll sulk in the gloom.
And if I were able,
I'd SMASH the whole ROOM!!!!"
I always liked that poem!
