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Old 09-26-2015, 01:55 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default The Batlord's Kitchen Sink Journal of Anything and Everything He Wants to Write About

Instead of being like Trollheart and making a journal anytime I feel like concentrating on some subject or other, I'm just going to use this as a place to write about everything I might decide to cover: music, games, TV, philosophical drabbles, movies, getting baked/drunk and writing a rambling post about nothing in particular just to see what comes out for my own personal amusement, etc. As such, I'll be closing my music journal, The Batlord Listens to Random **** and Talks About It, since this will include anything I would normally put there (My comic book journal will remain, however, as I want to keep that subject pure.)

Don't know just how much I'll be writing about any one thing, or how regularly I'll be updating this -- since I'm so uncharacteristically busy these days -- but I just like the idea of having a journal that's completely unrestricted.

Stay tuned, losers...
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-26-2015, 09:47 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Megadeth - Countdown to Extinction (1992)




It's been well-documented on this site how I feel about Dave Mustaine: love Megadeth's first four albums (and certain songs from their later albums) but I can't stand what their music became in later years (whether it be their inconsistent pop metal, or their mind-bogglingly tepid return to pseudo-thrash); and while I love Dave's Oasis-like egomaniacal douchiness, his right wing, Reborn Christian rantings are just annoying.

Regardless, along with Metallica and Iron Maiden, they were one of the bands that really introduced me to metal. Metallica were my first love, but once I became disillusioned by wannabe-teenage integrity at them for "selling out", Megadeth went from my second favorite band to #1 -- which is ironic considering that they did the exact same thing at exactly the same time. Still, it makes sense since I got into them through their same '90s period that made me drop Metallica like a bad habit.

No matter how I feel about Dave and the boys now, I will always be a mega fan for their place in my childhood. I worshipped the ground they and especially Dave walked on for far too long to ever write them off in my heart of hearts. Even Slayer doesn't evoke the same kind of warm-hearted nostalgia.

These days, however, I couldn't give less of a **** about most of their post-Rust in Peace material (cause why would you?) and Countdown to Extinction is where I draw the line. It has the same problems as Metallica's self-titled album which it attempted to ape: boring thrash-lite songs, complemented by legitimately entertaining pop metal that unfortunately gets worse with every listen.

But what separates the two albums is that Metallica were just better at their transition, and James Hetfield's toned down vocals weren't nearly as embarrassing as Dave Mustaine's.

So here I am, giving this album yet another chance to reconvert me (I really did love it when I was 15). It's been... years I guess, since I listened to it in its entirety, so perhaps my feelings will have softened. Since I'm so familiar with this album, I'm going to do this track-by-track as I listen to it.

*Full disclosure: for years my only copy of this album was a burned CD that was corrupted and somehow deleted several of the tracks ("Foreclosure of a Dream", "Countdown to Extinction", and "Sweating Bullets"), so it'll probably be almost like listening to them for the first time.

Let's do this...




1. Skin O' My Teeth: I was well aware that whatever my feelings about this album, this would be one of the songs that still stuck with me. This is pop metal at its finest. The riffs are badass yet fun, Dave's vocals energetic, and there's just a kick-in-the-pants quality that every album opener should have. I'll try to use this as a springboard for listening to this album objectively, but I can't promise anything.

2. Symphony of Destruction: It was either this or "Motopsycho" (the single from their then current album The World Needs a Hero) that was my introduction to Megadeth, so this song has extra nostalgia for me. Still love it, too. That main riff might be nothing like the technical wizardry of their earlier work, but god damn is it heavy as ****. Two tracks of awesomeness to start this album off, but I know full well that what comes next will be the drop off...

3. Architecture of Aggression: The first of many supremely awful song titles on this album, this was probably the song I loved most after I'd heard the actual best songs on this album way too many times. This is some of that tepid, thrash-lite I was referring to. It's got a pretty catchy chorus if you ignore the cringe-worthy lyrics ("You know your worth when your enemies
praise your architecture of aggression!" blech) and some tasty riffs, but otherwise it's not exactly noteworthy.

4. Foreclosure of a Dream: God damn it, I was not looking forward to rediscovering this song. Even back when I was still a hopeless fanboy I wasn't too broken up when my faulty copy of this album dropped this song. It was Megadeth's first attempt at a ballad -- presumably to copy the success of "The Unforgiven" and "Nothing Else Matters" -- but it's a dull, monumental misstep. Thankfully the band would get things together on the next album with "A Tout Le Monde", but this isn't half as good as that song. It's only real saving grace is a nice riff that pops up when the band can be bothered to stop with the ****ty balladery.

God that title sucks. Almost so bad it's good. Almost.

5. Sweating Bullets: I'm pretty sure I first heard this on an anime music video, and I loved every second of it. Not so much right now. It's alright, a 6/10 song if ever I've heard one, but it's not thrashy enough to be properly badass, and not catchy enough to really grab me. I'm struck by just how goofy Dave's vocals are (even more so than before), but their cheesiness is actually kind of charming. They're pretty much the only truly memorable thing about this. I could only ever love this song as a teenager.

6. This Was My Life: Another one of those poppy, thrash-lite songs. As with so many tracks on this album, the only things of note are a mildly catchy chorus and some moderately cool riffs. And even those are pretty much interchangeable with any other similar songs. Maybe that's the real tragedy of this album: sameness. At least "Sweating Bullets" had some personality. Not too many truly bad songs on this disc, just too many that don't stick out in any way.

7. Countdown to Extinction: I have no real memory of what this song sounded like or how good it was, so I don't know what to expect from this. Kinda sounding like a quasi-ballad, but I don't remember it being nearly as awful as "Foreclosure of a Dream". This is definitely pop metal, but it feels more like the kind of pseudo-hard rock the band would write for Cryptic Writings. Best chorus since "Symphony of Destruction", but the song as a whole isn't too memorable. At least Cryptic Writings had some pseudo-hard rock that stuck in your head, but this is just pseudo-filler. I'll give it a pseudo-thumbs up.

8. High Speed Dirt: Hell yes! This song has that same power pop energy as "Skin O' My Teeth", and it's almost as memorable. Just a fun romp that this album is in desperate need of. I don't know if I would even classify this as metal, but who ****ing cares. It just rules.

9. Psychotron: God this song is dumb. As far as I can tell it's a song about a killer cyborg that isn't at all metaphorical. Why Dave thought any of the fans he was trying to court would give a flying **** about the lyrics is beyond me, so it's a minor miracle that it's saved by being one of the heaviest songs on the album (second only to "Symphony of Destruction"). It's definitely not as good, but with the addition of one of the few choruses that rise above simply being "kind of catchy" it's still better than "This Was My Life". I remember loving this song as a kid, and now I remember why. It's not a forgotten classic or anything (the monotonous vocals on the verses drag it down too much for that) but it's still one of the better songs on Countdown to Extinction.

10. Captive Honour: Until I rediscovered how ****ty "Foreclosure of a Dream" was, this was by far my most hated song on this album. Multiple, overlong, spoken word bits at the beginning make this song drag before it has the chance to even get off the ground, and the fact that it doesn't know if it wants to be a boring ballad or faceless pseudo-thrash just make this song complete garbage. It's one of those songs that is too annoying to even qualify as filler. It just plain sucks.

**** you, Dave. **** you.

11. Ashes in Your Mouth: Yet another lobotomized "thrash" song to cap this album off. It would have been nice for Megadeth to have gone out with a bang to leave a better taste in my mouth, but this is what I get instead. It's certainly not the worst song on Countdown to Extinction, but it's yet another good-but-not-great song with some decent riffs that could have been switched out with the riffs from any other song without anyone noticing.

Weak sauce, Dave. Weak sauce.


Well, has my opinion changed at all over the years? Not ****ing really. I like the same songs I did back then, I hate the same songs (with the notable addition of "Foreclosure of a Dream"), and my indifference to the rest hasn't changed either. It's been too long for me to really even tell if I like or dislike this album even vaguely more or less than I used to. I honestly don't know how I feel about Countdown to Extinction: do I kind of like it for not entirely sucking? Do I dislike it for being pretty boring? Do I hate it for being the beginning of the end for one of my most beloved bands of all time? **** if I know. I suppose my indifferent ambivalence is the real verdict.

What the ****, Dave? What the ****?
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-27-2015, 12:10 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Metallica - Metallica (1991)




**** it, I think I'm gonna revisit a few more metal albums from my younger days that I haven't listened to in years out of indifference. I mentioned in the above review that Metallica were my gateway to metal, and I can't overemphasize that. The first four albums I ever bought were Master of Puppets, Load, Reload, and Ride the Lightning. I was quite simply obsessed and listened to almost nothing else for god knows how long.

I loved Metallica like I've loved no other band before or since. Maybe that's down to being older and less passionate about things in general, but I think it's also because my eventual disillusionment with them being sellouts* left me too scarred to ever really give my heart and soul to a band like I did with them. I honestly don't even really feel nostalgia toward Metallica, so deeply did I cut out any positive feelings toward them I had as a kid.

It's no wonder I went straight to Megadeth and Dave Mustaine afterward. We both shared a hated enemy who we wanted to see dead (Luckily we've both moved on from such childishness. >_>)

* It was no later than 2002-2003 when I made this "discovery". Hey, we were all mindless sheep when we were in high school.

But that's neither here nor there. So, The Black Album. Haven't listened to this album in dogs' years, and I've somehow been able to avoid "Enter Sandman" for so long that it's entirely possible that my overexposure to it has worn off. Not gonna hold my breath though. I heard that song WAY too many ****ing times in high school. Way too many ****ing times. It was the early 2000s and my local rock radio station was still playing it seemingly every hour on the hour.

**** it, all the things I said about Countdown to Extinction pretty much apply to my current opinion of The Black Album, so let's just get down to business...




1. Enter Sandman: Damn. Jumping right into the deep end, huh. Well, let's see if my indifference has worn off.

That is a pretty cool build up. I'll give the song that. And it kicks off pretty hard as well. Nah, though. The initial thrill has still worn off. It's certainly a catchy song, but... I'm over it as much as I ever was. Without that kick-in-the-nuts ear worm quality, this song just doesn't have enough going for it to reignite any fire under my ass.

Two minutes left and I'm already waiting for it to be over. Why was this ever my favorite song in all the world again?

2. Sad but True: Don't get me wrong, I'd probably like this song a lot better if "Harvester of Sorrow" hadn't already existed. Metallica just self-plagiarized themselves with this one, and dumbed themselves down in the process. The original is brutal as all ****, but this just isn't nearly as good.

And again, I've just heard this far too many times for it to have much impact. It just feels like I left a boring conversation in a party to go smoke a cigarette, forgot exactly what the people were talking about, came back in, and then remembered why I left in the first place. And now I'm kept hostage, since leaving a second time would just be rude.

3. Holier than Thou: Finally, a song I haven't heard five million and one times. And I was already over the band by the time I got into marathon music downloading sessions, so I don't think I ever even listened to this that many times.

I'm getting the same lobotomized thrash vibe that I did from a lot of Countdown to Extinction, but at least this pulls off the arena hard rock thing off with more personality than that album [I'm looking this over after about a half hour later, and I take it all back. Up with Countdown and **** this ****]. Still, I'm only mildly interested. Maybe I shouldn't have burned myself out on mediocre Megadeth, cause mediocre Metallica is becoming a chore.

What's next? "The Unforgiven"? Good. I actually still like that song.

4. The Unforgiven: I love the epic, tragic vibe of this song. Even though I've heard it more times than the sound of my hand on my penis it's still pretty great. Just metal enough to be badass, melodic enough to tug at the heart strings, and it's somehow catchy in a low-key kind of way that doesn't become irritating with overexposure.

Maybe a bit overlong, but I'm probably just in need of some powerviolence after all this tepid hard rock/metal-lite.

5. Where Ever I May Roam: Probably the only other overexposed song that I have hope of still liking. It's different enough, with too much coolness going on, for me to ever truly get over. Yeah, it's sounding pretty nice.

Alright, maybe I have heard this too many times. The main riff is awesome, but not enough to keep me from getting bored for a whole six minutes and forty-four seconds. Yeah I'm fading. At least the songs on Countdown were short, but there are way, WAY too many songs over five minutes on this thirteen-song album.

Wait a minute, why is "So What?" at the end? That was most definitely not on The Black Album. I guess they've since thrown it on as a bonus track? Whatevs. I remember it being a fun song.

6. Don't Tread on Me: I know I said in the last review that James' vocals on this album weren't as embarrassing as Dave's on his, but at least Mustaine's goofy singing had character. James Hetfield is just boring as a hard rock singer. On paper he's any band's dream, but... I don't know. I just don't at all care about what he's doing.

I remember that I'd never heard this song on the radio, and then 9/11 hit and it was everywhere. Of course us Americans were all about it back then, cause 'Murica, but now it's just bleeding into the rest of the surprisingly faceless pseudo-thrash on this album. Which is weird, cause they don't all sound alike, but they all have some variation of the same unmemorable chugging riffs.

7. Through the Never: And yet another interchangeable not-thrash tune, except that this is one of the filler tracks on the album. So it's even more unmemorable. God, now I wish I could go listen to Countdown to Extinction. I think I might after this, just out of spite.

The old, childhood hate is slowly returning, except due to boredom rather than some silly sense of betrayal.

Aw, ****! The next song is...

8. Nothing Else Matters: **** me. This song is six and a half minutes long and I'm already bored from the last seven songs. Remember how I said Metallica plagiarized themselves with "Sad but True"? Well this is a second-rate dead ringer for "Fade to Black" (which is one of my all-time fav Metallica tunes, unlike this snoozefest).

When James sings "Never cared for what they do! Never cared for what they know! But I know!", it just sounds so awful. You can't sing, dumbass. Stop trying. You got away with it on "The Unforgiven", but you've lost the plot on this one. God, now that I'm paying attention his whole performance on this song is just an abortion.

Is this song over? I think so. Yup. Thank god. Never realized just how much I hated it. I always thought I was just indifferent. I was wrong.

9. Of Wolf and Man: I have some hope for this song. I seem to remember still digging it even after I stopped liking this album, so it's possible this could rejuvenate me. Yeah, the chugging riffs are a bit more memorable this time, and it's only a little over four minutes long.

But there are still four more songs I have to slog through. I wasn't prepared for just how much I don't care about The Black Album. I seriously didn't start this for the express purpose of ****ting on it, it just sorta happened. I think I might actually rather listen to St. Anger to be perfectly honest, but don't quote me on that. I'd definitely rather listen to Load or Reload.

10. The God That Failed: Alright, this is yet another mid-paced chugger, but that's a pretty sweet riff. Okay, only five minutes long. That's not too bad. I can last this one out without hating its guts. Probably. Don't quote me on that.

11. My Friend of Misery: I was just going back to make a comment in the middle of song three, so I missed the transition, but **** this song too. And it's almost seven god damn minutes long. I guess they justify that by making it kinda ballady (cause ballads need to be long, right?) but really it's just more boring, mid-paced, boring, tepid, boring rock-thrash. God damn it.

How much left? Only two and a half minutes? Good? Still too damn long.

12. The Struggle Within: And here we come to the last of the filler tracks, and the end of the album. Thank. ****ing. God. I was ready for Countdown to be over, but I wasn't praying for it. Jesus Christ.

Oh my god, James Hetfielf may even sound ****tier here than on "Nothing Else Matters" (I just had to take almost ten seconds to remember the title because that's how fried my brain is from the deluge of mediocrity). He's got this goofy rhythm going on that makes it clear why they stuck this (thankfully short) ****fest at the back of this album.

**** it. I'm cheating.

*skip*

13. So What?: Seriously, does anyone else remember this song being on this album? I thought it was some cover from Garage Inc. I also don't remember it being this boring. It's not awful or anything, but whatever the original sounds like must have far more energy than this. Merely a meh, rather than a "**** all of this and everything that Lars Ulrich cares about !".

NO NO NO NO DON'T YOU DARE START TO REPLAY!!! **** YOU, "ENTER SANDMAN"!!! **** YOU SO HARD!!!


Alright, so, that wasn't good. Honestly, each individual song isn't so bad, and a few of them are even good, but when taken all in one sitting, one HOUR AND SIX MINUTE LONG SITTING, it becomes torture. My indifferent quasi-dislike has just become a grudge. Next time some twat comes to this site with an "Everybody hates on this album, but it's not nearly as bad as all these mindless sheep make it out to be" or a "Say whatever you want to about it, but it sold more copies than you ever could" or even "It's not that great, but I still kinda like it", I'm going to jump down their throat and **** them in the mouth. Seriously. The Black Album just made an enemy.

Someone get me Dave Mustaine's number.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-27-2015, 12:13 AM   #4 (permalink)
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You forgot to talk about the overproduced, POS album cover.
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Old 09-27-2015, 01:19 AM   #5 (permalink)
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The Batlord More Succinctly Reviews The Black Album



Spoiler for 01:


Spoiler for 02:


Spoiler for 03:



Any questions?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-27-2015, 03:07 PM   #6 (permalink)
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My comment about the album cover was directed to the Megadeth album, fyi.
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Old 09-27-2015, 03:29 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Megadeth - United Abominations (2007)




In keeping with the theme of dragging out albums I hate from bands I love, I'm giving United Abominations yet another shot.

I dug this when it came out, but I was just a tad too far past my thrash obsession be all "OMG MEGADETH DO MOAR THRASH!!!", so the only thing really affecting my objectivity was the constant hope that Megadeth, ****ing Megadeth, would make a comeback worthy of the name. Previous album The System Has Failed was surprisingly good, but with a back end that was nothing special, making me cautiously optimistic that Dave's quality control was still intact, even if the band was clearly permanently past its prime.

As time trudged on unfortunately, and I wore out the first half of United Abominations (I was never sold on it enough to bother playing it back-to-front that often), my appreciation for it dropped steadily: the laughable political lyrics were always awful and annoying, even for someone who doesn't tend to pay attention to them; there were some quality tunes, but not a one that could compete with the best from almost any previous 'Deth album, which all had at least ONE song that just knocked it out of the park; but what really began to turn me off the most about the album was just how stale and lacking in energy it was, making it obvious that Dave really didn't give much of a **** about making anything approaching thrash, but, after failing to maintain any mainstream longevity, felt obligated to cater to a new fanbase of dumb kids who wished it was the eighties.

I don't care if Dave doesn't want to do thrash anymore, and I'm no longer emotionally invested enough in the band to feel offended that I'm basically being condescended to. I can't even fault the guy for his pragmatism, as I doubt he has much in his bank account these days, so more power to him if he can trick some idiots out of their money. It's the seeming lack of giving any kind of **** about even making music in the first place that destroys this album for me. United Abominations simply has no heart or soul.

But let's see if my opinion has changed...




1. Sleepwalker: Coming out of the gate with one of the few actual thrash tunes on the album, Megadeth make a decent stab at old glories, but this would be a second-rate song on any of their better albums. The riffs aren't really all that memorable, and Mustaine's vocal performance is merely adequate. This just feels like thrash-by-the-numbers that doesn't even have the power of the more aggressive material on Countdown to Extinction or Youthanasia.

Not a bad song, but far from inspirational.

2. Washington Is Next!: And here we have the first of many political diatribes from Mustaine that comes across more as an excuse for him to bitch than to write an actual song. I dig it more than the last one though, as it has a bit of the speed metal energy of Rust in Peace. Certainly not bad, but I'm sure I'll forget what it sounds like once it's over.

The lyrics are also just confusing. He seems to weld apocalyptic, religious ranting onto political views that switch from social liberalism to right wing conservatism. I just get the feeling that even Dave doesn't quite know what he's on about.

3. Never Walk Alone... A Call to Arms: I actually forgot this song existed. It seems somewhere between the pop metal of the nineties and the quasi-thrash of half of Countdown to Extinction. It wouldn't feel out of place on that album, but it would also be one of the weakest tracks. It's pretty par-for-the-course here, though.

Dave seems to have a knack for writing tunes that sound good while you're listening to them, but fall right out of your head soon after. I have yet to actually dislike anything on this album, but nothing has grabbed me either.

4. United Abominations: This was one of the only songs on this disc that raised the bar back in the day, but it's also the most lyrically irritating. The main riff is just sick, but the minute-long, spoken word intro railing against the UN is just tedious. The rest of the song suffers from being a backing track to Dave's ranting against the government, while at the same time he condemns everyone who doesn't support it. What the **** are you even talking about, you nut?

Without all of that self-indulgent nonsense this would be a pretty top-notch outtake from Countdown. As it is, it's impressing me considerably less than it did eight years ago.

Oh my ****ing god, stop with the spoken word ranting! It's boring, you ass!

5. Gears of War: Mid-paced chuggery that is, again, a lost track from Countdown. Boring vocals are somewhat saved by a moderately killer riff, but anytime that riff isn't present this is kinda ****. I can dig this, but I won't be putting it on any Megadeth playlists (assuming I made playlists).

6. Blessed Are the Dead: God damn it. Its been three songs since Dave went on a religious spiel, but now he shoves it down our throats like a televangelist without any of the charisma.

Pretty much all the things I said about the previous tracks being cut-rate Countdown to Extinction apply here, but the riffs have a bit more energy and the chorus is easily the best yet, so this is as much a step-up as we're going to get. Probably the closest this album has come to a memorable song.

7. Play for Blood: And now the relative quality of the album drops off even further. This song is interchangeable with pretty much anything that has come before, but at this point album fatigue is making all the samey tracks run together. This might actually be just as good as the previous songs, but my lack of interest leaves me unable to care.

8. A Tout Le Monde (Set Me Free): And here we have the pointless remake of "A Tout Le Monde" from Youthanasia. It's inferior to the original, making the inclusion of Christina Scabbia from Lacuna Coil the only reason to justify its existence. But she only appears briefly to backup Dave during the second verse and chorus and sing the short third verse, with a performance clearly aimed at not upstaging her temporary employer, so she doesn't even really add anything. The woman can certainly sing, but she's never allowed to shine in any way.

Next!

9. Amerikhastan: Not as hilariously **** a title as United Abominations, but this is still a truly cringe-worthy title, and it's schizophrenic anti-conservativism/anti-liberalism just make this song a lyrical cluster****.

It's also the most boring song on the album yet (at least the previous has some kind of historical value to make it memorable).

God damn it, Dave. This spoken word **** you insist upon is making a boring song downright intolerable. **** the things that exist in your heroin-damaged brain. They don't make any more sense out loud either.

10. You're Dead: It's almost like the title of this song was created for a "Most Generic Metal Song Title Ever" contest. It's complete lack of memorability is only matched by the stale music. Thankfully it's also the shortest song on the album.

11. Burnt Ice: Frozen water that has somehow been damaged by fire without melting. That's some poetry, Davey Dave. Almost thirty seconds in and I already can't remember what this song sounds like. This album just keeps progressively plummeting ever faster off of the "Who gives a ****?" cliff. What were critics smoking when they praised this wombat turd?

12. Out on the Tiles: God damn it, why did I download the Japanese version of this album? This would be over, but now I have to sit through a bonus track. Alright, **** this. This sucks just as much as the rest of the songs on the second half of United Abominations, and I see no reason to subject myself to more of this when it's not even on the actual album.


Yeah, my opinion hasn't changed much, except the songs I actually liked I now care about just as little as the rest. "Blessed Are the Dead" can live, but everything else can **** right off. Go back to pop metal, Dave, cause you can't write thrash for **** anymore. Risk is infinitely more entertaining than this... this.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-27-2015, 05:13 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Slayer - God Hates Us All (2001)




Never really hated this album, but I've long since discarded it; if I'm on a Slayer binge then I really don't feel the need to go past Seasons in the Abyss. It was new when I started listening to the band, and I played it out a bit back then, but even then I only liked maybe half of the songs, and the rest just kind of bled together into a non-descript chugfest. Clearly the band were going after the nu metal, Slipknot contingent with this album, but at least they never toned down their assault in a misguided attempt at radio play. Unfortunately, though the music was never anything less than brutal, the Slayer gimmick had devolved into self-parody that tried way too hard to be controversial (God Hates Us All might be a cool album title, but god damn is it goofy.)

I'm not anticipating that I'll hate this, but I'm also not expecting to be wowed...




1. Darkness of Christ: I'm honestly a bit bitter at this track. The one time I saw Slayer in concert I was hoping they'd open with "Hell Awaits" and the backwards-chanting zombie intro, but got this instead. I suppose it's a more "relevant" intro in the modern sense, but still doesn't have quite the same charm. Still a damn good way to start off the album, and those riffs are just kickass.

2. Disciple: The first in the trio of opening songs that I remember being my favorite part of this album, and definitely the best of them. Pretty much every song is some variation of the mid-paced chugging showcased here, but "Disciple" simply rips. Definitely one of the best post-2000 Slayer songs by a Satanic mile.

It's certainly a bit Slipknotty, but pulls off that sound far better than that band could ever hope to. This is some sick ****, even if it doesn't have quite the same personality of Slayer's best material.

3. God Send Death: That slow-building intro, followed by a comparatively blistering riff assault, is another highlight. The song alternates between slow and menacing, and fast and brutal, keeping things from getting monotonous. It might not be thrash in the traditional sense, but it's infinitely closer than anything any of the other Big Four had released since the eighties.

It's more memorable than much of the material on the album, but I still wouldn't compare it to an "Angel of Death" or "Seasons in the Abyss". Totally solid though.

4. New Faith: The thrashy, post-thrash chugging continues with another album highlight, but it's also got a slightly cringe-worthy line with "I keep the Bible in a pool of blood so that none of it's lies can affect me!" that tries too hard to be offensive, but succeeds only in making Slayer sound desperate. Aside from that though, bitchin'.

5. Cast Down: I vaguely remember this being another good song, but by this point the chugging starts to become interchangeable, so otherwise good songs start to blur together into unmemorability. Luckily most songs don't go past the four-minute mark, so even if all the songs sound alike at least they don't outstay their welcome.

There's a tasty, sludged out section in the middle that's definitely more than a bit badass, giving a nice bit of variety to break up the brutal-yet-samey riffs of the rest of the album. Even if this isn't the best Slayer album, it's still far superior (so far) to 95% of other metal albums.

6. Threshold: This is by far the most nu metally track yet, with a quasi-hip hop vocal delivery and matching start/stop guitar rhythm. It's just a tad crap, but much of the rest of the song is more brutal chugging that fails to stick in your mind but serves its purpose for the song's two-minute run time.

Nothing bad on the album yet, or even truly mediocre, but I probably won't remember what most of the songs sound like after they're over.

7. Exile: It's a shame that Tom Araya's vocals have deteriorated to the point that he can't do much more than scream, but they still suit the music, so it's not much of a problem. They still contribute to the interchangeable nature of the music though.

This is yet another now-generic chugger, but retains the relative quality of the rest of the album, so while I'm not totally engaged, I'm not bored either. The album's only half-over though, so I don't see that lasting.

8. Seven Faces: After so long it's past time for some variety, but at least we finally get a bit with this track. Slower and sludgier than the preceding songs, with a sinister vibe, this song still isn't the most memorable, but it's a nice change of pace anyway.

9. Bloodline: Slayer has generally "evolved" from Satanic lyrics to simply anti-religious ones, and at first glance this seems a return to form (it's about a vampire). But this was actually written for the Dracula 2000 soundtrack, so it's not really old Slayer. Just cash-hungry Slayer.

Luckily it's one of the more memorable songs on God Hates Us All. It's as chuggy as the rest of the album, but it's also got a bit of catchy accessibility that makes me remember why it was one of my favs back in the day.

10. Deliverance: Another sludgy song that still chugs along with more riffs that could have been switched out with any from the rest of the album without anyone noticing. As such, it's no worse and no better, which at this point is getting kind of boring. If it hadn't been so long since I'd heard God Hates Us All I'd probably be getting album fatigue right now.

11. Warzone: Chug, chug, chug. I seem to remember liking this song a bit more than the rest of the album, and I guess the slight rise in tempo was the reason. It's post-thrash, but borders on actual thrash. However it's still not all that memorable.

12. Scarstruck: That is one dumb name. Apparently it's a bonus track that is for some reason not at the end of the album. Don't know why they felt the need to move it up the tracklist, as it's no different than anything before it, but it doesn't really matter as God Hates Us All doesn't actually have much in the way of an album flow anyway.

13. Here Comes the Pain: This song was actually recorded two years prior for a wrestling compilation (*snort*). I guess it's a tad more well-known because of it, but certainly not for being any better than anything else on the album. I could probably hit skip and miss nothing. I think I'll do that, actually.

*skip*

14. Payback: Definitely waiting for the album to be over now. Nothing I've hated, or even really disliked, but God Hates Us All just has nothing to recommend aside from its reliable intensity. As a soundtrack to a curb stomping, it's perfect, but as a unified listening experience you could just play the first few tracks and then go listen to better Slayer.

15. Addict: Last song and the second bonus track. Nothing different about this either (shocking).


Another album that hasn't really changed my opinion with time. Absence clearly does not always make the heart grow fonder. This is by no means terrible, it's just one of Slayer's weakest albums, though possibly their most brutal. This is a clear case of a once great band running on fumes and coasting along on the inertia of their core sound. I doubt I'll be going back to this anytime soon.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-27-2015, 05:53 PM   #9 (permalink)
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My comment about the album cover was directed to the Megadeth album, fyi.
Yeah it's not good. I'm pretty sure that the old guy is supposed to be hanging himself BTW. He's suspended in midair like he's dangling from a noose, but I imagine the record company probably didn't want an album being targeted at the mainstream to have a depiction of suicide on its cover.
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Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien
There is only one bright spot and that is the growing habit of disgruntled men of dynamiting factories and power-stations; I hope that, encouraged now as ‘patriotism’, may remain a habit! But it won’t do any good, if it is not universal.
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Old 09-27-2015, 06:05 PM   #10 (permalink)
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The Batlord More Succinctly Reviews The Black Album



Spoiler for 01:


Spoiler for 02:


Spoiler for 03:



Any questions?
Breaking it was too quick and merciful a death. Don't you own a flamethrower?
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